A for alcohol, A for Absolut

Yeah, it's the alcohol. Nothing more.

Never in my life had I used being drunk as an excuse for mischief. But this time, for sanity's sake, I will. How else will I explain this?

"this" I'll try to explain with as much ambiguity as possible.

I've been drunk before. Heavily drunk. You know, the kind of being drunk that makes you swear you'll never touch Absolut again. Or the kind of drunk that makes you dance on the "ledge" of Bed. Or the one that gives you one hell of a hangover.

No, not drunk, just tipsy. Still able to function as a normal being on the surface. It's what's brewing inside that's bugging me.

When was the last time I put myself out there and played the flirting game? Can't even remember. Nowadays it's the aloof-and-disconnected-slash-uninterested-guy-whom-you-can-sleep-with-but-never-twice facade. It works well in screening out sissies and those marriage-types who'd ironically go to bed with you if you so much as give them the chance. No, nowadays am done flirting.

So why am I flirting with him tonight, only alcohol can answer that. And it's not the onslaught of innuendo that's keeping me fueled, it's the totality of the evening. The look. The words. The hands. The resting of one's head to the other's shoulder. The "how's my hair - oh you have something on yours let me get that for you" stuff.

Subtlely can only be found by the really dense or by a distracted bystander.

There's a dozen reasons why I should have done otherwise. Reasons enough to make a soft cookie run as fast as I could. Yes my instincts are telling me to run. Yet my ego won't let me. Only one reason:

i.like.

So, alcohol is to blame. Why is it always Absolut Kurant that gets me into trouble? Anyway, morning after I'm so ready to dismiss this as just one of those crazy nights that should have been boring if not for the booze and the music and the man. Until I saw the email - had fun last night blah blah.

Two things I've read somewhere that're supposed to tell you it's not a one-night thing:
1. When he asks "So, when do I see you again?"
2. When he leaves a message "Had fun last night" after you've already said your goodbyes.

Two sure things, the magazine article said. This time am not buying it. This time am running.

It's just the alcohol.